It’s been seven years since CASA volunteer Nadine Turner was first matched with eleven year old *Javier. Over the years, she has approached their relationship with humor and directness. When the two were first matched, Nadine admits there were moments of awkwardness with Javier. She laughs as she describes, “He’d get into the car with his hoodie on and not say a word so I would talk to fill up the space until I realized, ‘I’m getting tired of listening to myself,’ so we’d drive around and listen to music. Once I learned to just be quiet, it wasn't as awkward as me trying to say, ‘well my dog did this or that.’”

Youth in the foster care system typically experience frequent disruptions and moves in their lives so CASAs are asked to make at least a two-year commitment when they become a volunteer. Many, like Nadine, remain in the role far beyond the two-year commitment. Over the seven years the two have been together, Javier has been assigned to 6 or 7 different social workers, at least 11 placements, and a variety of new schools. Nadine says, “We’ve been through a lot together.”

She shares some of the turmoil Javier has lived through and the important role she plays in his life, “His dad died 5-6 years ago in a shootout in Mexico. His mom has a meth habit and struggles with mental illness. He sees his sisters off and on but there’s a lot of family drama, someone’s always mad at someone. He says I’m the most stable thing in his life.” 

Because he missed a great deal of schooling due to bouts of homelessness and constant moves, there are significant gaps in Javier’s learning. “He’s a good kid, there’s lots going on in his brain. I have advocated for him to get therapy and tried to help him navigate his way through school. He moved around so many times and then when he got to high school, Covid hit and he was isolated in a cottage at Orangewood with no WiFi so he couldn’t even do his school work for a while.” 

Nadine eventually became Javier’s Educational Rights Holder. In that capacity, she was able to attend all of his Individualized Education Program (IEPs) meetings, as well as parent teacher conferences and back-to-school nights. Nadine is a big reader and tries to find books for Javier to help him with both reading and writing. She says, “Even with all his moves, he’s kept all the books I’ve bought him as well as all the cards I’ve given him over the years; birthday cards, ‘I’m proud of you’ cards, and Valentine’s Day cards.”

A few years ago, after being let down by his family once again, Javier told Nadine that no one in his family cared about him or ever even asked about his day. Since that time, Nadine has sent Javier a text every single morning saying, “Have a nice day.” She laughs when she says her 38 year old son complained that she didn’t do that for him, so she now sends him a daily “Have a nice day” text as well.

Nadine’s Advocate Supervisor Edna Valdez shares a story about how Nadine was the only non-staff person who showed up when Javier graduated from high school. She attended both his graduation ceremony and the party afterwards at his group home but no one from his family was in attendance. 

Now that Javier is 18 and a high school graduate, he has recently transitioned into independent living. Nadine continues to walk side by side with him as he moves into this next chapter. It has not been a smooth start as Javier was faced with bed bugs and fleas and a flare-up of his depression when he moved into his apartment. Nadine has been advocating on his behalf and coaching him on life skills which have ranged from how to use a bug bomb to how to shop for groceries.

She helps him via text and in person telling him, “Start with the little things; organize a drawer or the top of your dresser.” Together they went to the grocery store because Javier called Nadine to say there was no food to eat. Nadine said, “I reminded him that HE had to go to the store and figure out what to buy to eat. We took a gift card and went to get milk, bread, frozen pizza, etc. He was like, ‘Wow, there are a lot of different kinds of milk!’ I taught him how to compare prices, expiration dates, and told him organic is going to be more expensive.” She laughs when she shares, “He texted me a few days later and said, ‘when the milk smells like cheese, does that mean it’s no good?’” 

“The challenges of living on your own are pretty significant when you’ve had no life coaching,” says Nadine. “I’m trying to help him learn how to cook a few things so I texted my kids to ask what they ate while they were in college. My son said they ate a lot of ramen and baking Funfetti cakes always got the girls to come down the hall when he lived in the dorms.”  

Javier is sharing his new apartment with a roommate and they live across from a community college which provides supportive services for young adults in the dependency system. He gets priority registration and his IEP transfers over from high school so he gets special accommodations. Nadine says, “We got a campus tour from a former youth in foster care who was able to share all kinds of great tips about the special programs and services available to him.” 

Javier currently has no bike or car but his brother offered to sell him a car for $5,000 which presented another mentoring moment. Nadine is teaching him how to determine what the car is worth and what it will cost to maintain. “I have him put gas in my car when we go out so he can see what gas prices are like. I’m encouraging him to include gas and insurance in his calculations and determine how many MPG the car gets.” I told him, “If you can get a good student discount and stay out of trouble, it will help your insurance rates go down.”

Edna, Nadine’s Advocate Supervisor said, “Nadine has always shown up for Javier, she’s picked him up from 11 different placements, connected with him consistently throughout Covid, and has stayed on the case long past the initial two-year commitment. She is the only consistent adult in his life and has been a strong mentor and advocate for him for the past seven years. She takes every opportunity to work with Javier on independent life skills. 

Nadine laughs when she says, “Our relationship is like it is with my own kids; sometimes you have to let them make their own mistakes but I will tell him, ‘I get to say I told you so!’ But if things do work out, he gets to throw it back in my face.” She goes on to say, “These kids need us - it’s not easy but a lot of the time it is fun and you get to make a connection. Sometimes it’s really small improvements and sometimes it’s big epiphanies. Helping kids feels good!”  She adds, “More than once, he’s said, ‘you came back!’ and I tell him, ‘I told you I wasn’t going anywhere!’” 

If you’d like to learn more about becoming a CASA, please email Norma Mendoza or sign up to attend an upcoming Information Session. 

*Name changed to protect privacy